" The confusion that followed my earnest prayers is not surprising to me now. If there is an Enemy of Souls(and i have not the slightest doubt that there is), one thing he cannot abide is the desire for purity. Hence a man or woman's passions become his battleground. The Lover of Souls does not prevent this. I was perplexed because it seemed to me He should prevent it, but He doesn't. He wants us to learn to use our weapons."
I recently picked up Elisabeth Elliot's Book Passion and Purity. As I read this book, I find myself more and more amazed at the heart she had for the Lord. I love how Elisabeth had such a desire to please the Lord and to do the will of the father, yet was so incredibly honest with the Lord about her feelings and passions.
I know the struggle all too well. the struggle to keep my heart pure and my relationship with God pure while trying to balance the days passions. It almost seems as though i fight it in such away as if i were not allowed to feel the things i feel, and to say those things (my desires; the truths of my heart) audibly. To the Lord it would be my end.
" i listen now to contemporary stories of love hoped for, gained, and lost,and am reminded that it was in these matters of the heart that my own heart was sifted and scoured and exposed, the process of purifying begun" I think a lot of times I forget that purity is a process. It's not something to have and then lose, its something God works in us. Though Elisabeth's heart was sifted,scoured, and exposed time and time again, she realized she was in the process of purity- not that she had lost it. Praise God! He sees us clothed in Righteousness!
God only knows the things I've done. feet that have gone where they ought not to have, hands that have touched what they ought not to have touched, eyes that have seen what they ought not to of seen, and a mouth that has both said and done what is displeasing to my Father in Heaven. yet before the foundations of the earth He knew me, separated me for Himself, and sent His only begotten Son to die for the sins HE KNEW I had yet to commit. I thank my God that He sent His son to have His hands nailed in my place- taking away what i have done with my own. I thank my God that His Son's feet were nailed so that His blood would wash away the filth in where i have allowed myself to walk. I thank my God that His son's blood was spilt for my passions that were not submitted to Him and I thank my God for willingly suffering and withstanding agonizing pain until all the sin of the world was dealt with and defeated. OH THAT MEN WOULD GIVE THANKS TO THE LORD FOR HIS GOODNESS-psalm 107